What if it was easy?

by Nancy Tetreaux

in Newsletter Thoughts from Nancy

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What if it was easy?
Thoughts from Nancy…
HeadshotDecember 19, 2012

Sometimes I’ll be deep in the middle of something and I’ll feel like I have to stop what I’m doing and bust out and make a list.

 

It feels really good to get all that stuff down on paper. Now I don’t have to remember it. Phew! But then, of course, there’s the matter of actually having to do or buy, write or call everything and everyone on the list, which takes a lot more time than it does to write it down.

 

I’ve noticed lately that I’ve been making twice as many lists as I normally do. I think it’s the holiday thing. There’s more to do, more to buy and more people to call and write than usual, and the usual seemed like a lot already.

 

Then comes that big internal sigh; “Poor me! First I have to do this, and then I have to do that, but first I have to go here before I can go there because I have to get this thing before I see that person and run that errand…yada yada yada” Have you heard that tape before? Does it ever play in your head? Ah, the holidays.

 

Despite our best efforts and good intentions sometimes we become overwhelmed by the expectations we have of ourselves and of the expectations we perceive others have of us. For some of us it’s the expectations that make the holidays stressful.

 

This isn’t to say that our obligations might not be very real and that some of our encounters with others might not be difficult, or that the preparing and traveling and everything we’ve agreed to do isn’t tiring. I get it. But what happens along with meeting all these expectations is that we find ourselves expecting to feel pressured and tired.

 

What if we decided that in spite of the expectations, the demands on our time, the rushing, traveling, spending and visiting, that it was all going to be easy? (Yeah, right Nance! Tell me how that’s going to work.) Stay with me now.

 

We are much more apt to find what we deliberately look for – what we expect – than what we don’t. If you think about it, this just makes sense. When you get hungry you start to notice places to eat and the smell of food is more stimulating. If you get it into your head that you want a blue car you start to see blue cars on every street. Why? Because you’re focused on them. We are much more apt to find what we are focused on. And we are more likely to have the experiences we expect to have.

 

So try this: If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed, worried or maybe even a little resentful as you navigate the holidays this season, when those feelings arise stop that tape in your head and ask yourself: “What would it be like if this was easy? What if I let this experience be fun? I’m going to stay relaxed and make this (whatever it is) easy – no matter what. I’m so relieved and grateful now that I see that this (experience, day, trip, encounter) can actually be fun and easy.”

 

The world will go on spinning and people are going to do what they’re going to do, but you can choose your thoughts and behavior.

 

What if you expected this holiday season to be the best one you ever had? If that seems unlikely to you now, crack open the door to the possibility and see what happens; see what you find. I hope it is the best holiday ever for you.

 

You deserve it!

Wishing you much love and Joy this holiday season – and expecting it for you too!

 

~ Nancy

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